It's only my third day

My third day in my new job and I’m knackered, not physically exhausted but mentally buggered… there’s so much information to take in. So many procedures and so many steps to do things and so much to remember! I know they don’t expect me to really fully understand all of it for some time but boy, firms like this just deal in information, it’s all they have and now I have to remember where all this information goes! The work itself is not difficult, actually is rather easy… so as long as everything works (you know, things like the computer, databases, access to databases, internet…) and as long as I remember what to do with each piece of information, then I should be a-o-k…. in the meantime, I just have to take it step-by-step.

(**note to self** ok brain, this is where the memory part of you has to pick up the slack a bit, you will need all the memory power you can muster together – you will actually need to remember things for a change, there is nobody around now to help you with this anymore)

It’s good to see that things just work around here (in the very short 3 days that I have been here), as opposed to my last job where you know that things CAN and WILL work if only I had the ‘right approval’ to get it. If only I didn’t have to go through so many people just to get this approval. If only I just had access to it… if only… if only… Here, if I wanted to install a program onto my computer, all I have to do is click on an icon, select the program and click ok. I don’t need approval, I don’t need to ask anyone, IT dept do not need to help me and it’s absolutely foolproof. And if I do have an IT problem, the staff do not necessarily have to physically come to my desk, they will try to work things out for me remotely. They have the ability to operate my computer remotely! You have no idea how bizarre it is to see your mouse moving around the screen seemingly by itself, completely possessed because I am definitely not doing it.

You really don't need to do much to impress me - I am so easy! :)

Aside from learning new things, it feels really strange to be the one person that doesn’t know anything and having to learn everything all over from scratch again. It feels so bizarre to not be the ‘go-to’ person for things. It feels weird to see somebody else be the ‘go-to’ person and I feel a little bit lost (not just because I’m the new girl…). At least this time round I have 4 other people I can turn to for help when I need it and unlike the last time where I was alone and just left to my own devices for the first few weeks – now THAT was tough! It kind of went something like this… “Here’s your office, here’s your computer, sorry this place is such a mess, and umm… sorry there’s nobody around to tell you anything whatsoever, good luck! See ya later.” Now, I’d like to see you try making friends after that kind of induction!

Anyways, I’m deviating now, the point I’m trying to make is, I like being needed, I want to feel wanted so it feels strange to not be needed by anyone anymore. Not just yet, but give me a few months and I’ll make myself indispensable! :)

*sigh* It’s gonna be a long and boring 12 months though… I’ll be looking at tax returns every single bloody day for the next 12 months, I’m gonna have tax returns coming out of my ears and considering I’m one of the many who avoid doing their tax returns until the very very utmost last minute, this job might actually bore me to death… besides, it depresses me seeing how many people earn so much more than me, and it’s even more depressing seeing that some pay more tax and/ or get a bigger tax return than my entire annual salary *extra big double sigh*

BUT – there will be one thing I won’t and can’t complain about anymore and that is, I will not be bored doing nothing. I will definitely not be doing nothing.

I must admit that over the last three days, I have questioned whether I have made the right decision. What have I got myself into? Should I have given up my perfectly ok job for this very quiet mad-house? Do I want a perfectly ok job for the rest of my life? And I guess, I keep coming back to the same answer… I will never be satisfied with a perfectly ok job, I will end up depressed and miserable and that’s why I need an absolutely awesome job, one that I will never get bored of. Now, the only thing to do is to find out what an absolutely awesome job is… and how will my new job help me get there?